


Home A-Scone

by yourrockyspine



Category: Bob's Burgers (Cartoon)
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-19
Updated: 2018-10-19
Packaged: 2019-08-04 13:16:16
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 482
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16347416
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/yourrockyspine/pseuds/yourrockyspine
Summary: Tina's attempt at creating home-baked goods goes horribly awry.In comes Zeke, knight in disheveled Goodwill's finest.





	Home A-Scone

**Author's Note:**

> A loving shout-out to Zeke's secret genius cooking skills in 'Bob and Deliver'.
> 
> As well as Tina/Zeke OTP, because... uh, clearly.

It was 9PM and seeing as her parents were out on the town, enjoying another one of their scheduled "dates", Tina Belcher stood hovering over a slab of dough.

_I've got to remember how to make scones out of nothing; nothing... nothing... nothing._

Her Thundergirls recipe was no help at all in these times of crisis.

"So you're dough now, I got that right..." mumbled Tina under her breath. "But what will you become next?"

"Proof of your never-ending loneliness?" shouted Louise from across the kitchen.

"A sturdy replacement for Dad's ding-dong?! It's rich in wheat but it'll take the lead," yelled Gene.

Tina painstakingly removed her attentions from the slab of dough currently torturing her in order to assemble her siblings.

"Mom and Dad said no funny stuff after 8. It's after 8 and I think you're still being pretty funny, so..."

A prolonged groan alerted Tina's younger siblings to the end of their fun and games.

"FINE! But someday soon I'll learn to bake a better scone than you ever could and everyone at school will adore me and then where will you be? Nowhere. _NOWHERE_!" screamed Louise.

Gene simply walked past, emitting fart noises that seemed oddly precise insofar they were being directed at Tina.

" _Fine_ ," sighed Tina, focusing once more on the directionless bunch of dough in front of her. "What will you be? What, what..."

Over the next couple of minutes, she'd managed to knead the dough into two seperate-but-conjoined globes. " _Butt._ "

That, as far as Tina was concerned, would've been that, but then the doorbell rang.

She made sure to turn off the oven before hopping down the stairs (a breathless "Huh" meeting the odd, slightly more composed "HAH!" on the way down). She swung open the door, only to be confronted with that place on Earth where a single pleasant surprise met the utterly unpleasant.

"Jimmy Jr. _Zeke_."

"Zeke thought he smelled saffron through the window so he said we should come over and now here we are!" said Jimmy Jr.

"Nose don't lie, Tee, pretty sure that's a song!" nodded Zeke.

Tina sighed, deeply. "Fine, but no stirring the dough, my Dad would know."

The two boys launched themselves at Tina's unfinished product.

"YES, ZEKE! That's food!"

"Got that right, J-Ju! I'm detecting a hint of cumin as well as saffron and- oh, yes, _yes_! That's nutmeg! Git you some!"

Zeke shoved a handful of dough in Jimmy Jr.'s face, while the other boy protested.

"Ffffftop it Feke!"

"No, no, in it goes, stop struggling!"

As the two boys wrestled, Tina's groan of frustration came out altogether more erotically than she'd planned: a pair of prominent butts on display would do that.

"Feel it!" yelled Zeke, rubbing dough into Jimmy Jr.'s lovely face. "Come on! Feel the rosemary!"

_He noticed the rosemary_ , Tina thought faintly before remembering that this was Zeke.

_Zeke._


End file.
